Like a Mofo

Like a Mofo

Joules J writing to Sahar G-B

you ARE old and lame-how can you think jokes about smegma are gross? would you prefer "my mother in law is so two-faced , when she cries her back gets wet"?

i miss you like a mofo. ughrghghghhhh. lets get matching tattoos. of like..... whats our favourite thing. wine? wine smoothie? bruce? safety firth? no! christopher plummer. anyway. ive been reading this tattoo website and all these bestfriends get matching tattoos and im all like aawwwwwwwww :) so lets do it when i come. it can be like right next to our anuses or something if you dont want anyone to see it. 

Also.... Our flat is so rad. Ugh. And its started raining which I fear is like god breaking the seal. Like summer was the drunken happy high and now hes started peeing and will never ever stop, onlyy for a moment to turn around and vomit snow. Then shit will be chill and peaceful as he passes out. Man that is the best metaphor ive ever coome up with. 

Had a dream about you all last night. i dream about you every night. Every time I do im saying goodbye to y'all its wearying. Maybe in like 2-3 weeks we'll have internet. and we can skype endlessly

please don't forget about me-i know its easy since I live not in the same country as you and am probably really needy. i should start slipping great facts about myself into updates. i was the one who discovered dna.

so if you remember me by my updates only you will remember a magnificent person

by the way i have an iq of 164 and my penis is between 9 and 10 inches at last measure